Safety behaviors are subtle actions we take to protect ourselves from perceived threats. Take, for instance, the glass of water on stage, meant to ward off panic attacks caused by throat dryness. Or the avoidance of eye contact at social gatherings, driven by the fear of negative judgment.

Though well-intended and seemingly harmless, safety behaviors actually perpetuate the anxiety cycle. They give us a false sense of control, whispering, “You can go on stage, but only with that glass of water” or “You can attend the party, but only if you avoid eye contact.” In essence, they reinforce the belief that danger lurks and we are ill-equipped to handle anxiety if it strikes.

Instead of resorting to safety behaviors, we can label them when their urges arise and remind ourselves that even though this activity feels dangerous, it’s not actually dangerous. In fact, feeling anxiety means our amygdala is triggered, which feels really uncomfortable, but it’s actually a good sign. It means our amygdala is working and it also means it’s open to learning a new lesson.